Only when ease and trust are felt and he maintains stable contact. Then keep it brief, concrete, solution-focused. Then return to daily life, do not make it a constant topic.
Ah, the sweet smell of freedom. Or is that just the scent of desperation wafting in from the dating pool? If you’ve ever gone through a breakup, you know that the moment you declare yourself single, it’s like the universe sends out an SOS to every man within a 50-mile radius. And let me tell you, they respond with the urgency of a fire alarm.
Let’s talk about the situation that inspired this post. Our heroine (let’s call her Cassi) just ended a relationship with a man who decided he was suddenly enlightened about polyamory—because nothing says ‘I’ve got my life together’ like realizing you want an open relationship right after your girlfriend finds someone new. Classic move, right? 🙄 It’s like he was waiting for the green light from the universe, and the moment it flickered, he was ready to jump into the deep end of the dating pool.
Cassi did what any sensible person would do: she took the advice of her friends, who collectively decided that dumping him was the best course of action. And, oh boy, did he take it well. He sent her a photo of himself crying, which is honestly a little rich coming from a guy who was suddenly all about being poly. But hey, at least it gave Cassi a good laugh. Who wouldn’t chuckle at a grown man weeping over a breakup?
Now, let’s dive into the chaos that ensued post-breakup. Less than 12 hours after she waved goodbye to her ex, men began to swarm like bees to honey. Apparently, her single status was akin to sending up a bat signal for all the eligible bachelors. Picture this: Cassi, minding her own business, walking downtown, and out of nowhere, a cute guy on a scooter turns around to ask for her number. It’s like a rom-com moment—except she was probably just trying to get her steps in for the day.
And then there’s the ex who thinks a Miami visit is just what the doctor ordered. This conversation took a turn when he casually asked if she was ovulating. Because nothing says romance like discussing your reproductive cycle, am I right? And let’s not forget the friend who’s suddenly in love with her. Because, of course, now that she’s single, all these men are ready to declare their feelings.
But wait, there’s more! An old Hinge match has popped back into the picture, asking her out for drinks. And surprise, surprise, he’s also an engineer. Cassi has apparently had enough of engineers for a lifetime. It’s like they’re the ‘default’ option in the dating app world—reliable but oh-so-boring.
And let’s not even get started on the TikTok suitor asking for feet pics. I mean, what is it with men and feet? Is there a secret club that I’m not aware of?
Cassi’s life is a whirlwind of unwanted attention, and she’s just trying to cope with her recent breakup while managing an MCL injury and the stress of moving. It’s a lot, and the last thing she needs is to sort through a lineup of suitors. It’s almost like becoming single comes with a complimentary subscription to ‘Men Who Want to Bother You.’
In a moment of sheer emotional clarity, Cassi decided to consult an Etsy witch (because why not?). Instead of the usual ‘he’ll come back’ nonsense, the witch told her to stop dating men based on their potential and pay attention to their actual behavior. It’s a good reminder for all of us: sometimes, you’ve got to be your own fairy godmother and recognize when to cut your losses.
So, what’s the takeaway from Cassi’s saga? Well, it’s a reminder that being single is a valid choice. You don’t have to jump back into dating just because the universe—or your ex—decided to throw a party. Sometimes, you just want to enjoy your homemade butter chicken, binge-watch your favorite show, and not deal with unsolicited romantic advances.
In conclusion, whether you’ve recently become single or are happily riding the solo train, remember that your peace is sacred. And if you ever doubt that, just think of Cassi and her crying ex. I mean, that’s enough to make anyone appreciate the bliss of being unattached. Cheers to freedom, homemade butter chicken, and the occasional unsolicited foot pic request!
Inspired by: “Broke up with my age gap/newly poly bf and men can sense it” (r/GirlDinnerDiaries)